He Hasn't Showered in Two Weeks — and It's Not About Being Clean
Bathing is the first daily task most older adults give up, and the reason is almost never stubbornness.
Falls and home safety
The house your parent has lived in for forty years is the most dangerous place they spend time in.
The fall people picture is a dramatic one on a curb somewhere. The fall that actually happens is three steps from the bed, on a rug that has been there since 1994, at four in the morning. Home is where the hazards are, precisely because it is the place nobody inspects.
These essays cover the ordinary geometry of that risk — bathrooms, stairs, lighting, footwear, the hydration and heat problems that cause the dizziness before the fall — and what the evidence supports rather than what gets sold. Most of what works is unglamorous and cheap, and most of it never gets done because no one in the family is the person whose job it is.
11 essays
Everything we've written on this
Nobody Has Looked at Your Father's Feet in a Year
Feet are the one part of an aging parent's body that nobody checks — not you, not him, and often not his doctor.
You Just Spent a Week at Your Parent's House. Here's What You Actually Saw.
Every August my phone fills with adult children home from a summer visit who can't shake something they saw. You weren't imagining it. Here's how to read it.
Your Mother Stopped Drinking Water on Purpose — The Bathroom Problem Nobody Says Out Loud
She says she is just not thirsty. She is rationing — because getting to the bathroom stopped being automatic, and she will not say so.
It's 95 Degrees and Your Father Won't Turn On the AC: Why Summer Heat Is a Silent Danger for Older Adults
On the Westside we assume the ocean breeze handles the heat — until it doesn't, and the people most at risk are the ones who never feel it coming.
The First Thirty Minutes: What a Trained Eye Notices Walking Into Your Parent's Home
A nurse counts four things before taking his shoes off — a curled rug, three pharmacies, the grunt getting out of the recliner.
The Fall That Changes Everything Usually Starts in the Bathroom
One in four adults over 65 falls this year, and 80% of home falls happen in one room.
Why Your Parent Is More Likely to Fall at Home Than Anywhere Else — And What the Evidence Says Actually Works
More than one in three adults over 65 will fall this year — and roughly two-thirds of those falls happen at home.
Summer Is Coming and Your Parent May Not Feel the Heat — How to Keep Aging Adults Safe When Temperatures Rise
As summer approaches, the CDC reports that adults over 65 account for the highest proportion of heat-related deaths in the United States — a risk that has…
Aging in Place in West LA — What It Really Takes and Why You Don’t Have to Figure It Out Alone
Most older adults I meet on the Westside want the same thing: to stay in the house they've lived in for thirty or forty years.
The Fall That Changes Everything — How to Keep Your Aging Parent Safe at Home in West LA
One in four adults over 65 falls every year. The CDC counts about 36,000 deaths and 3 million ER visits from falls annually.
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